I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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