No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
