You're a womanizer and a bitch.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
