Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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