Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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