thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
