I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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