he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
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