So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize