i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
