I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
