lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
