Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Randomize
