Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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