im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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