That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
