i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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