Texts From Last Night

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  (540): View more from Virginia

  just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever

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  (540): just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever http://tfl.nu/k011
  Replies (34) Good night (7676) Bad night (1002)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.

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  (360): Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time. http://tfl.nu/zvvg
  Replies (7) Good night (3333) Bad night (1059)
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  (585): View more from New York

  its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck

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  (585): its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck http://tfl.nu/jjii
  Replies (14) Good night (3851) Bad night (986)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"

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  (772): I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up" http://tfl.nu/z0ws
  Replies (12) Good night (2214) Bad night (903)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.

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  (608): I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/60pl
  Replies (5) Good night (714) Bad night (2397)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.

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  (801): Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches. http://tfl.nu/nznf
  Replies (3) Good night (643) Bad night (1881)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.

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  (+44): next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius. http://tfl.nu/19nm
  Replies (3) Good night (520) Bad night (1145)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck

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  (240): did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck http://tfl.nu/lph9
  Replies (7) Good night (944) Bad night (886)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept

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  (502): How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept http://tfl.nu/59ls
  Replies (13) Good night (542) Bad night (1668)
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  (418): View more from Quebec

  You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner

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  (418): You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner http://tfl.nu/wvf5
  Replies (6) Good night (944) Bad night (429)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?

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  (908): if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator? http://tfl.nu/2ohc
  Replies (6) Good night (1010) Bad night (480)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.

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  (303): Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth. http://tfl.nu/h368
  Replies (11) Good night (2732) Bad night (529)
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  (650): View more from California

  I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet

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  (650): I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet http://tfl.nu/2n36
  Replies (3) Good night (642) Bad night (307)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me

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  (720): Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me http://tfl.nu/71h4
  Replies (8) Good night (542) Bad night (380)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.

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  (816): Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious. http://tfl.nu/g2fz
  Replies (0) Good night (410) Bad night (164)

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