Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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