Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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