yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
