good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
