guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
