I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
