Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
