I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize