he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
