it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize
