I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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