dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
