we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Randomize
