Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
