So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize