Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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