I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize