There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize