I'm lost and stupid without you.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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