Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
