No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
