Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
