the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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