Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
where are you?
Hypothermia
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
