So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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