Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
