This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
She announced her abortion via fbk
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Randomize
