where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
