matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize