She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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