So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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