i just wanna soil my oats bro
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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